its 6.52 now and my eyes are hurting like fuck from crying. This is the right step, is it? isnt it? it is about time i do this right? is it? i need to let go. this is what i need to do. this isnt healthy anymore. wheres my future? why is it only in his mouth? in like gasping for fucking air i love this man so much ya Allah but i cannot be with him anymore
now its 5.44, 2 days later. hey baby i wish you were here next to me, you can sleep in your tshirts and i can sleep in my little shorts, i can hug you and your legs and you can play with my hair and sleep in my neck. life can be so simple if you can only go after what you want. i want to breathe your breathing and i wanna bite your hand, i wanna run through your soft back and hold the back part of your neck and play with ur hair like i always do. i wish you would just ring my doorbell and just tell me youre ready for marriage, with me, and then we can do it. and we can live the cozy mornings everyday. i wish you would love me the way i love you, maybe then i dont have to suffer with the uncertainty, maybe then i wouldnt have to find someone else who could love me the way i love you.
0.45 the next day, found out ure in Bali.. byebye? i dont wanna love you anymore
